No, I am not blogging about Twitter today. Although I am on Twitter and, if you're interested, can be found using the handle @AuthorMJFifield.
The 'twitterpated' I am talking about is a reference to the 1942 Disney animated classic that traumatized a generation with that whole Bambi's mother death scene. All I can say is Wow, Walt. Does someone need a hug? And perhaps a therapist?
And I'm not actually talking about Walt's potential mother issues either. Not really anyway. I'm talking about the scene where all the little cartoon forest animals fall in love. They get, as the wise old owl explains to poor little innocent Bambi, all twitterpated.
Here's how the Urban Dictionary defines 'twitterpated':
1)to be completely enamored with someone/something.
2) the flighty exciting feeling you get when you think about/see the object of your affection.
3) romantically excited (i.e.: aroused)
4) the ever increasing acceleration of heartbeat and body temperature as a result of being engulfed amidst the exhilaration and joy of being/having a romantic entity in someone's life.
Okay, great, you might be saying to yourself right about now, thanks for that life lesson but what does that have to do with anything? Well, I'll tell you...
The unthinkable happened last night. Big fell in love. And not with a cheeseburger or a tree on which to pee. Nope, Big found himself a little girlfriend.
She's in our agility class. Her name is Roxy. She's a Malinois like the Gator Girl, only more of a spaz (that's right. I said more of a spaz. Ponder that for a moment. Is your mind now blown because mine is). However, she's a spaz who did not try to chew off Big's face so maybe that's what did it for him but he could not take his eyes off her last night.
And he wasn't watching her in his usual "can I take your face off" sort of way. That's the way he looks at the neighbor's dog or the rogue suicidal birds who happen into our yard (Big hates birds. I cannot stress this enough). No, the way he was watching Roxy fell more into the 'whoa baby' category. Plus, there were other, uh, indications that maybe he was harboring a gigantic crush. I feel like making a Dr. Horrible reference here. Can anyone guess which one? Ultra Mega Bonus Points to the one who does...
And he really couldn't keep his eyes off her. There were ten dogs in that class (six German shepherds) and when the other eight were working the course, Big was more or less asleep. But the second Roxy started her run, Big sat straight and watched her every step. The woman next to me in line at on point said, "I'm surprised he isn't drooling."
I was surprised too.