Monday, September 14, 2015

In Which I Attempt To Get Back To Work (and a Book Release)


Wow. It's been a while since I was here last.

I was supposed to have come back two weeks ago, but then I did this thing where...I didn't.

I've had that thing a lot this year. Like, pretty constantly. All right—there's nothing pretty about how constantly I've had issues doing...well, anything.

In my endless maturity, I have decided to blame Florida. I've been here five months now, and I'm just not comfortable here. It's hot. Like, crazy hot, and heat makes me miserable. The air conditioning unit is my new best friend. Not that it matters because it's not like I want to go outside anyway. I'm not exactly...comfortable with all of Florida's wildlife.

Snakes, for example. At home, I wasn't a fan of snakes, but I wasn't stand-on-a-chair-screaming afraid of them, either. But I think I have now officially crossed over to the other side.

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have seen this pop up in my feed, but a couple of weeks ago, I was sitting at my desk working away on the manuscript that will never, ever, ever be finished (another blog post for another day, perhaps) when I looked out the window and saw a snake sitting in the plant, looking at me.

My reaction is best explained in the following gifs:



and



That's right. I literally ran away from the snake. That was sitting in a plant (or whatever snakes do. I don't think they sit.). Outside.



I guess the good news is that I actually got some exercise that day. From both the vigorous running away, as well as the endless pacing in which I partook during the time in which I was attempting to figure out how to get the hell out of Florida.

But, c'mon! What was that snake doing out there? Looking for story ideas to steal? If that's the case, Sir Hiss, the joke's on you because I don't have any story ideas! I pretty sure Florida has killed those, too!

Was it scoping out the location of my top-secret Kit-Kat drawer? (Which I absolutely do NOT have.)

What was it doing?

At this point in time, you, like my significant other, may be tempted to offer reasonable, rational explanations or suggestions such as You're overreacting or Get over it or The snake was not trying to steal the contents of your not-so-top-secret Kit-Kat drawer, which you absolutely do not have.

But here's the thing...I have no sense of reason anymore. Rationality means nothing anymore. It dried up in the sun like a freakin' grape.

Raisin. That's what my brain is these days. A useless raisin that has no idea how to write a damn novel.

Of course, the same could be said about my brain even before it turned into a raisin.

But again, that's another post for another day, perhaps.

The bottom line is that I need to start doing better. Today is the day that I start doing that. I know I've said that repeatedly over the last five months, but perhaps today will be the day that I stop lying about it.



Before I go get started on that, I want to give a quick shout-out to someone who actually has her act together. Author Tara Tyler has a new book available today—Simulation. I haven't read it yet, but I'm hoping to do so soon. Can't wait to see what Cooper will be up against this time.



After Pop Travel, Geri convinced Cooper to move back to Atlanta, but for familiar reasons, things didn't work out... In Simulation, Geri is fighting her way back to full-fledged, solo agent status, but first has to deal with one more annoying sidekick on an equally annoying case. Meanwhile, Cooper takes his mind off Geri leaving him by throwing himself into his work, investigating an illegal clone android simulation operation. Sparks fly when Cooper and Geri's cases lead them down the same path. Of course Hasan wants to help them with their cases, and connives a plan to get them back together in the middle of all the chaos!

SIMULATION delivers more technology, more intense action, more humor, and more exciting new characters. Come along for the ride.

Find Simulation at:

Kindle
Goodreads Giveaway

Congrats, Tara!!

44 comments:

  1. Sorry you're not liking Florida much. But I have a feeling that will change this winter when we're all freezing to death under a mountain of snow up here and you're basking in the December sun. I'll make sure to share the miserable weather we're having so you can feel better :)

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    1. Yes, not being trapped under a mountain of snow will likely not suck. That's true. And my back will appreciate lying on a beach instead of shoveling snow.

      But December is still really far away. Hope I last until then.. :)

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  2. I had pretty much that same reaction the first time I saw a palmetto bug. I was on the phone, turned around and there it was, sitting on the side of the book case. I think I screamed into the phone.

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    1. I had to Google 'palmetto bug' and now I feel confident in telling you that I would have done THE EXACT SAME THING.

      And then I would have burned down the house.

      Well, maybe not that last part exactly, but you know what I'm saying.

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  3. Yay for Tara! Loved her book. I sympathize with you. I've already told my husband several times over the years, we are never moving farther south than we are now. In fact, since the brown recluse spider's territory has extended to our area and rattlesnakes have been re-introduced to Indiana, I want to move north. I'd rather face bears in Alaska than spiders and snakes.

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    1. Yes, exactly! We had bears in New Hampshire, and they never, ever bothered me. Even that time when I encountered one while walking the dog. I'd much rather deal with bears, too. No contest.

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  4. I totally get you. Weather can make or break a place for me and it sounds like Florida is not for you. It's one of the reasons why I'm leaving SF. I need a different climate.

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    1. No, summer in Florida is definitely not for me. I might enjoy winter, though.

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  5. Congratulations to Tara!
    You need to shake up your routine. Attack things from a new angle. Or you'll just fall back into the same pattern.
    Maybe that snake was looking for raisins?

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    1. If he wanted raisins, he should have been looking in someone else's office. There are only Kit-Kats found in mine.

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  6. That snake would've unnerved me. Then I would've been grabbing my camera and taking pictures.

    Florida is hot and humid. I'd like being close to so many theme parks though.

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    1. I did get to go to Harry Potter World last month. I did enjoy that. So maybe Florida isn't all bad...

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  7. Welcome back! I would have ran down the street screaming if I saw a snake. They are one of the things I fear the most. Seriously. My neighbor has been having problems with snakes, but luckily none have showed themselves at my house. I find it hard to write in summer too. I think you need some rainy weather:)

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    1. Congratulations to Tara. She has been working so hard.

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    2. I would have considered running down the street screaming if doing so hadn't involved going outside. :)

      Tara has been working incredibly hard. I am in awe of her.

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  8. Good luck to Tara! And I don;t like crazy humid hot. Been that way here in So. Cal. this summer and we spent most of our time indoors with AC on or at the mall or movies.

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    1. That's basically what I do. Staying inside during the summer just seems so counter-intuitive to me. I never did that at home.

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  9. OMG snakes . . . NO. We've been thinking about a Florida move, umm, thanks for saving me O_O


    Yay, Tara! Congrats, girl ;)

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  10. I see snakes around my place pretty often. They're mostly just little ones and they don't scare me. Hope you and Florida learn to get along soon.
    Susan Says

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    1. I hope so, too. I'm afraid I'm stuck here for a while.

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  11. I'm sorry but I cracked up laughing when I saw those gifs and imagined you running away from a snake...on the other side of a window.

    I live in Florida too (have most of my life) and I also hate how hot it is. I can't wait for late October/early November when it should start cooling down.

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    1. I am curious about this 'cooling down.' I'd like it to be cool enough for me to wear long pants again. I'm so tired of shaving my legs.

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  12. Living somewhere you don't really like can't be good for your muse. I don't blame you for struggling to write. As for the snakes. Try not to think of them as your enemies, but as your own little armless cheerleaders, rooting you on to reach The End.

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    1. I didn't consider that possibility. Little armless cheerleaders. Thanks for that. :)

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  13. I don't think I've even looked at the hard drive that houses my novel in about a year. It's like I started dating Chris and then went What novel?

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    1. I wouldn't mind so much if I hadn't actually been trying to write this damn novel. But when I actually am putting forth effort and end up just treading water, it gets rather discouraging.

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  14. Ugh, heat and humidity. And snakes! I'm not afraid of snakes, but Florida snakes...I'd probably run away too. Didn't someone lose a king cobra there recently? I do know that Florida has the highest percentage of pet snakes that were let loose in the wild. And...I'm probably not helping. Um, good luck writing.

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    1. Yes, someone in Orlando lost a king cobra the same day there was a snake outside of the office. It really didn't make me feel better about staying in Florida.

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  15. You know, I think my brain has turned into a raisin, too. And I don't even have to deal with Florida heat!

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    1. Is there any way to rehydrate a raisin? Perhaps I could research that.

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  16. Does anyone know how to write a novel? I'm pretty sure I don't. Twelve manuscripts later and I'm still winging it.

    I would have freaked out about the snake too. I had a total hissy fit about some ants this summer. Not my finest moment, but I'm pretty sure I'd react the same way if it happened again.

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    1. There was an ant incident early on in our time here. I didn't run away, but I did swear a lot.

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  17. I know what you mean about the summer heat. Last week was miserable here. And we've been getting humidity on top of it. But I'm sure given time you'll find something to enjoy about Florida. Considering all the crazy stories that come out of there, you've got to get some good people watching going.

    Congrats to Tara.

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    1. There would be some great people-watching...I should consider leaving my house some day. :)

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  18. Tara Tyler is a writer babe!!! And wow, just wait for the alligators that come!! Oops. Did I say that?? My sister lives there. I visited with my son to go to disneyworld and the heat was terrible!! We did everything at night.

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    1. I am waiting for the alligators. There was a neighborhood newsletter reminding residents about the possibility of gators being in your yard. Good times.

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  19. Nice to see you back. Just checked out your previous post too. When I write in longhand I know i write better. So, snakes eh? Maybe you'd like to visit Australia, lol!

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    1. I really would like to visit Australia someday. I'll figure things out. Eventually.

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  20. So sorry Florida has been so miserable for you! (Not surprised it is, though, especially after that snake incident. Yikes!) At least you can use it as a scapegoat! I have no idea what to blame when it comes to my own raisiny brain lately, except for...well, myself. LOL.

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    1. Feel free to use Florida. It's a big state; it can handle it. :)

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  21. Holy Hell. Your response to a snake stalking was completely and totally reasonable. Your Man needs to realize that. Quick.

    Wishing you cooler weather and a never ending supply of Kit Kats to grace your not-really-there stash.

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    1. Thank you, Ava. I shall need a never-ending Kit Kat supply to keep pace with this never-ending novel I'm writing.

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  22. Sounds like you're having a rough time. We have a Kit-Kat supply too, but we have to keep ours in a bag hanging from the ceiling, otherwise the kids get to them. Mmmm... Kit-Kat. Maybe break off a piece of that Kit-Kat bar?

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