Friday, May 13, 2011

Blogger's Back And So Am I

I've been working at the day job the last few days because it turns out Management was desperate enough to put me on the schedule. They had to get all the new summer merchandise out on the sales floor and, keeping with their long standing tradition of ineptitude, left it to the very last possible moment. And while my own long standing tradition at The Store involves being a brutal truth telling pain in the ass, I'm a very efficient brutal truth telling pain in the ass who does not require any micromanaging. A muzzle, maybe. But micromanaging? Not so much.

This still did not stop the Opening Manager that first day from giving me a refresher course in how to use a hanger. I'm not kidding. I looked at her a moment, realized she was serious and said, "I know I haven't been here in a while but I still remember how a hanger works."

I've worked in retail the majority of the past sixteen years (and just writing that sentence has sent me into a very deep depression which I'm sure can only be cured by a Harry Potter movie marathon and copious amounts of cake) and I'm pretty sure that I could be completely lobotomized and still would remember how a damn hanger works.

But whatever. Something else came out of my work week: a possible need to quit the Couch to 5K Challenge. And no, it's not because of its complete lack of cookie eating time (although, seriously, what is up with that?). It's not even because of the shin splints or even that sharp shooting pain I seem to have developed in my left thigh. It's because someone in The Store's corporate office stumbled across this same plan (hoping they didn't first learn about it on this blog. That would be awkward) and now seems to think it would be a great company wide incentive.

Being a pain in the ass is not my only long standing tradition at The Store. Not participating in company wide (or even store wide) events is the other.

I'm undecided at the moment.

Fortunately, I found a great distraction to save me from making a decision. I told you at the beginning of the month that I had sent out the first group of chapters to my brand spanking new CP. And since then, I hadn't heard anything from her. I was starting to develop a brand spanking new complex (you know, to go with all the other ones I have) along the lines of "why oh why don't any of my friends like me" and "why oh why doesn't anyone who says they're going to read my book actually read my book? It's because I suck, isn't it? It is, I know it is and I should apologize to Mike for ever asking him to read anything that I wrote."

Fun times, I tell you.

But last night I received in my inbox a message from the CP. This triggered the ritual panic dance which involves an intricate weaving together of chest pains, hyperventilation, pacing and my hand hovering over the mouse as I contemplate whether I really want to know.

But of course I want to know. There's no point in having a CP otherwise, is there? And feedback I've received in the past has always been very useful (well, maybe not that one Jane Austen comment) and head swellingly positive but it still doesn't stop me from worrying about it.

Here's what my CP said:

I finally got a moment to sit down and open up the Prologue.......... and I am pretty excited to read the rest. I mean, I don't even LIKE this genre. I never READ this genre. I don't GET this genre. But after reading the opening to this book, I actually want to keep going...

I'm choosing to view this as a good thing.

Hope y'all have a fabulous weekend.


  1. Yay! That's definitely a good sign! That's so exciting! Good for you!

    P.S. I think it's time to abandon the Couch to 5K challenge out of spite towards The Store...

  2. That is a good sign! Wow, that's what half of my book's fans tell me, so you're on to something great there.

  3. Yes, that sounds like a good thing.

    If you let The Store stop you from the Couch to 5K Challenge, then they've won. Haven't they? (I've got a great argument for this in my head, but I can't find the words. Sorry. Friday. I'm an idiot on Fridays.)

    Unless you just want a way out of it. Then you can call it The Store's fault.

    Ah, yes, I remember the pain of working retail. I much prefer a room of squirrelly 7th graders.

  4. A good thing is just that, a good thing. Just keep doing what you're doing and things will keep turning positive. Have a great weekend!

  5. I worked retail years ago and I felt the same way as you most of the time. Glad you have the hanger thing mastered. My children don't. They never hang anything up. I should get them a job until they learn the skill.

  6. I had to LOL at you wanting to quit just to get them. I'd be inclined to do the same thing if I wasn't really into the Couch to 5K. Otherwise, you could pretend that you quit it and they just wouldn't have to know you were still doing it, right?

    Next time someone tries to show you how to use a hanger just start shrieking, "No...wire...HANGERS!" That should do the trick.

  7. Is there anything a Harry Potter marathon and cake can't cure? :)

    I think the message from your CP is definitely good news. Waiting on critiques is so painful. I'm hoping the rest of your waiting period goes quickly (though I'm sure fun times in retail may not make it seem so.)

  8. That is awesome news from the CP!

    I'm in agreement about cake and Harry Potter healing all wounds. Although for me cake is more of a delivery method for Frosting.

  9. I say it is a good sign and since they are not familiar with the genre then you will get a fresh perspective and it won't be tainted with someone who might favor one thing over another in that particular genre. Best wishes.